santa baby

That's me in the santa suit and that's banjo in the elf outfit. We're getting the sleigh ready to take off for Christmas. Just wanted to wish everyone a very merry holiday season and i'll see ya'll right back here after the new year!

cookie baking 101

Last night Michelle and I went over to our friend Melissa's house for some pre-holiday fun. We ordered pizza and drank beer and decorated cookies. Melissa showed us how to decorate the cookies so that they look really nice.. Almost professional. That example is the cookie is on the left. A perfect rudolf. But after a few beers the cookies started to take on a weird sort of Haight Ashbury feel. They still taste yummy tho!!

which one's mine?

You may be wondering what this is.. perhaps some sort of outerspace diagram or maybe a tribute to an abstract artist? No no.. this is what i see everynight at the dog park. Michelle got Banjo a red collar that lights up so we can find her in the dark. BUT! She told all the other dog owners where she got it and now ALL the dogs have red light up collars. Nobody can tell which is which in the pitch black of daylight savings time.

but baby.. it's cold outside

Wow does it suck to be outside in san francisco today!
Cold, rainy, windy... just plain icky.

a change of heart

Michelle is making me crazy! She changes her mind every 5 minutes about how she wants to treat christmas... whether we get presents for each other or not.. what they are and what she wants. Sometimes she wants an adventure like a vacation someplace! Then she changes her mind and wants us to save our money and get a bank account and deposit the money we would spend on each other. Other times she wants yoga pants and rainboots. Then she goes back to the vacation idea.. then the bank account.. then the yoga pants... oy, you get the idea.

Tiny

Michelle went out and got us the worlds smallest christmas tree. Its a rosemary bush shaved into that cone shape of a christmas tree. Its very cute. We dont really know where to put it.. and we cant really put any presents under it. Unless the presents were like little barbie outfits and shoes. I'm on the hunt for tee tiny ornaments and an itty bity angel for the top.

hand eye contact

If you're ever in a rainstorm and Michelle offers to share her umbrella with you.. back away. She can't control that thing. She poked me right in the eye this morning.

eye contact

My motorcycle has been a nightmare this year with parking tickets and vandalism.. so i met a guy at lunch about renting a garage space to keep the local crackheads from stealing my sparkplugs. I havent actually had this happen in a long time and i was sort of flattered.. and sort of repulsed.. as he talked to me he stared directly at my boobs. With absolutely no deviation. Just kept staring at them. But whatever, i have a parking space and in san francisco i'd do just about anything to get one.

pee chair

Roscoe our big fat cat has decided to stop peeing in his box and has started peeing on our blankets and pillows and the dog's bed. Michelle has given me the responsibility of figuring out why he's doing this. I havent discovered the cause but i've invented this cat pee chair.. you simply stick the cat in the little pee seat and he rolls around in it all day and can pee anyplace he likes.

lucky charm

Yesterday Michelle and I met our friend Matt at the Valley Tavern to watch the New York Giants play the Chicago Bears. Michelle and Matt dont like football but they humored me and rooted for my G-men. It was a really tight game and in the end the Giants came out victorious! Now michelle and Matt have to meet me there every sunday and wear exactly the same outfits.. good luck, you know! I dont think they're too happy about that. But really guys, your sacrifice of a couple hours every sunday is for the greater good.