Thursday, August 20, 2015

garden party

A few days ago I injured my left calf while running. Pulled a muscle. I went to my acupuncture lady and she put 3 "tacks" in it and told me to leave them there for 2 days. She also recommended that I run through gardens.  ?

Update: The tacks are out and the calf feels great. However, to my Berkeley friends, no need to worry...I did not run trample your daisies.

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Gate

Michelle and I went on a quickie vacation and stayed in a cute little cottage with a fence around the property. The gate had a key code lock on it. Each time we entered Michelle looked up the code on her phone, typed it in and presto! The gate opened! As I was packing up the car to leave Michelle walked out onto the sidewalk with her bags and let the gate swing shut. I tried to grab it, but alas, it slammed. Our phones with the key code were still in the cottage. We were officially locked out. I went into immediate Macgyver mode! I walked the 6 foot high fence perimeter and looked for the best spot to climb it. I found a corner where I thought it was strong enough to hold me. I grabbed everything we owned from the car and stacked it up next to the fence. Suitcases, bags of chips, beer, anything I could find. I finally had what I thought was an amazing architectural hodgepodge of a staircase and was ready to climb it, jump over the fence and be the hero! I went back to the car to find one last piece of whatever to pile up for the final step. And the gate was open. What the? I walked down the path to the cottage where I found Michelle inside cleaning. I looked at her with my hands in the "What the hell?" position. "Oh," she said, "I remembered the code."

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Monday, August 10, 2015

hole

Michelle has many talents. One of her most amazing talents is to be able to locate the only hole for miles around and fall in it.

Saturday, August 01, 2015

I cant believe its not butter

The other day we had a little get together with friends. We had some different style of cheeses but my favorite was a super delicious chunk of White Irish Cheddar. Michelle had placed all the cheeses left over from the party in a zip-lock bag and put it in the fridge. I thought the cheddar might be yummy on top of a bowl of Chili so I grabbed the cheddar and grated it over the top. I couldn't wait to eat it! mmmmyummmm.........I snuck a handful of the grated cheese and shoved it in my mouth! I love cheese. I mean, I LOOOOOOVE cheese! But.... this didn't...taste...like...cheddar. In fact, it didn't taste like cheeeeese. It tasted like......?.....BUTTER?! I stared at the pile of cheese and watched it slowly melt into a greasy oil slick. "MICHELLE! DID YOU PUT BUTTER IN THE CHEESE BAG????"      "Yah, why?"       "UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST ATE A MOUTHFUL OF BUTTER!!!!"  "eeew, why'd you do that?"   "UGH!!!"

Friday, July 24, 2015

bra

You know its time to stop eating the cookies when you sprain your wrist trying to clasp your sports bra.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Teeth

Michelle loses track of her appointments. The other day she thought she had a Gynecologist Appointment but it turned out she was scheduled for a teeth cleaning. Here's what she told the dental assistant.

"I got mixed up this morning and thought i had a Gyno appointment. I shaved but didn't floss. SORRY!"

Lucky Day!

Michelle said that getting pooped on by a bird is good luck. Well, Halleluja! It's my lucky day!