Wednesday, May 26, 2010

yoga


Lately I've been taking "casual carpool" to work. Its a handy dandy way to get to the city from across the bay. The deal is... drivers don't want to pay the bridge toll and the carpool lane is free. Alas, most drivers dont have enough passengers to fill the car. Pedestrians don't want to pay for the train but dont want to drive either. aaaahhh... A perfect storm. Drivers need passengers and passengers need drivers. A true win-win for everyone involved. So cars line up at a designated area and pick up passengers. Nobody talks. You just sit there and look out the window and pretend you don't know the others are there. The car radio MUST be tuned to public radio. You ride for about 15 minutes and then TAH-DAH there you are in the city. For FREE. Awesome system.

Well, the other day i got in a car that only had two seats. A little sports car type thing. Not new and fancy tho.. kinda old and taped together. I could smell that new age hippie smell of too many years burning incense. I think it had permeated her skin as well as the worn leather seats. We said good morning to one another and then she took off like a rocket. Zig-zagging her way thru traffic.

"I'm sorry," she whispered in a weird sort of purrrr.
"But I'm late."
"Oh that's fine." I turned and gazed out the window. I was trying to keep with the rules and limit my conversation. But it was no use. I got a talker driver.
"Whats up with the weather?" she asked.
"I think its going to clear up." I said, hopefully.
"I think it's going to be beautiful today."
"Ahhhh...yer a dreamer. Just like my ex-husband." she purred.
"in any case, I'm late to jail." she said.
"Jail?" i asked.
"Yes, jail.

silence.

zig, zag.

silence.

I couldn't help myself. I had to ask.
"So... you work at a jail?" I whimpered.
"Yes," she said thru a clenched, toothy grin. "I teach yoga to inmates."

silence.

And then the ride ended. And she sped off to jail.

if only i could be a fly on the wall in THAT yoga studio.

8 Comments:

Blogger R.E.Double L.Z said...

www.hirellz.ning.net

8:39 PM  
Blogger jeesau said...

Oh that's priceless.

9:48 AM  
Anonymous myra said...

you're such a great storyteller! you writer you

12:33 PM  
Blogger pork luck said...

Myra, that's a super compliment coming from a talented writer like you!

12:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahahhhahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!
Someone, either you, Bridget, or Andrea, was telling me about the riding w/ strangers over the bridge deal. I was still living in LA then, & I thought it was the strangest thing I'd ever heard!
hey, why don't you put your awesome stories/cartoons on FB?
SFW

6:42 PM  
Blogger Cake said...

Awesome! And your picture to go with the story is purrrr-fection, as always! Yay!

5:15 PM  
Blogger jen said...

HiLARious

2:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a great story. You tell it so I felt like I was there. Funny stuff, yet true...amazing.
Jamama

6:18 PM  

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